Giving to Yourself- Even in Hard Times

As we all know, life isn’t always a bowl of cherries. But one way to get through the ‘pits’ of life is to give ourselves little treats amidst the difficult days. These gifts to yourself can keep you going even in the hard times. They don’t even have to cost anything— giving yourself a foot massage, lingering over a Saturday breakfast, and going for a long walk at sunset—these are simple ways to take good care of yourself and be ready for the better days to come.

“One of the secrets of a happy life is continuous small treats.”
-Iris Murdoch

Expectations and Happiness

Americans are known for expecting a lot out of life. This is the very essence of the American dream, but our unfulfilled expectations can lead to chronic dissatisfaction with who we are and what we’re doing. Even our successes and accomplishments become cumbersome because once we achieve one goal we are always setting new ones. This saps the joy from achieving the small milestones that lead to a better life. Sometimes we need to simply say “Enough!” and choose to be satisfied with our lives and who we are. This type of attitude can lead towards contentment.

“Expect nothing, live frugally on surprise.”
-Alice Walker

Guys and Giving

Guys, it’s time to get your give on. According to the latest statistics, women are more likely than men to volunteer. 30% of women were actively involved in service last year, compared to only 23% of men. So, grab your guy friends, or maybe a girlfriend who already volunteers. Choose a service opportunity that interests you and get involved. It’s painless, and you’ll be back to Sports Center in no time!
 

Good Citizenship

Last week I got a letter in the mail from the local county government. Upon opening it, I was immediately disappointed. I had been assigned to jury duty, and this obligation could last as long as two weeks! In the midst of a busy schedule, this was exactly what I didn’t want to get in the mail. However, after thinking about it further, I realized that this is not a huge commitment and is a small price to pay for the freedom that comes from living under the justice system we have in America.

Sure, I could probably find a way to get out of the jury duty. I’ll be in the final throes of a project for work at that time, but I’m going to do whatever I can to follow through on this obligation. In fact, I’m now starting to look forward to it. I’ve never been on a jury or involved in a trial, so I’m sure I’ll learn a lot. Being a good citizen means honoring our civic responsibilities. Even if it means two weeks of jury duty!

Remembering Birthdays

Birthdays are the single designated days when each person should feel special. You can make a difference in someone’s life by simply remembering their birthday. For an office colleague, sending a brief birthday email or asking about any special plans goes a long way in terms of showing that you care. For friends and family members, sending a card is a terrific way to stay close and let them know that they are loved. You can do this through a free e-card or through the mail. Getting a physical card in the mail is always a nice touch. To keep track of dates, you can make a special birthday calendar where you record everyone’s special day. Remembering people’s birthdays takes very little time and effort, but the impact that you can have on others is significant.

Quick Calls to Build Community

Want a way to connect with others and make meaningful relationships? Give a long lost friend or relative a call. In a world of Facebook (which is great), we often forget that having conversations with people can be a much more meaningful way to stay in touch with the people who are important to us. So often, we only stay ‘in touch’ with people by taking a look at their online profiles and status updates. But this doesn’t give you the full picture. Calling someone can help you reconstruct the personal bonds of relationships that are so important.

You don’t have to schedule a time or send an email first. Calling out of the blue is fine. Let them know that you’ve been thinking about them and want to reconnect. Ask about their work situation, how their family is doing, where they live, and anything else you want to catch up on. It might seem awkward at first, but they will really appreciate knowing that you thought of them and wanted to reconnect. This is a wonderful way to build up your community.

Change for Change

Need an easy way to get money so that you can give it to a good cause? Bring out your piggy bank and start collecting loose change. Anytime you find a luck penny or have a case of ‘wallet obesity’, dump your coins into the bank. You’d be surprised how quickly that little pig can fill up. It’s also strangely satisfying to know that every time you insert change, you are making a difference in a way that’s important to you.

Once you’ve stuffed the pig, go to a local bank and ask if they will convert the change into bills for you. Some banks charge for this service, so be sure to ask first. However, other banks such as TD Bank, have a free coin sorter in the front lobby. Once you get bills in exchange for all of your pennies, nickels, and dimes, you can use the funds to make a donation to a nonprofit, church, or other charity. So there you have it. Donating can’t get any easier than that. It’s truly change for change.

How to Help Someone Get a Job

Know someone that’s unemployed? Here are some ways you can help that person get a job:

• Offer to provide a positive reference
• Connect with unemployed friends, former coworkers, and family members on LinkedIn so they can access your network of connections as they search for jobs
• Be willing to talk with someone who is interested in transitioning into your field of work
• Periodically send an encouraging email to anyone you know that’s unemployed. Let them know that you’re thinking about them and that you’ll do whatever you can to help
• Look to see if your company is hiring. If so, think about whether or not you know of anyone that would be a god fit for any of those positions. If they’re hired, an added benefit of being able to help someone get a job is that you may receive a referral bonus from your company

Being able to work and provide for our families is important, and helping someone get a job will lift their self-esteem. This even boosts our economy.

Be Prepared

Being prepared isn’t just for Boy and Girl Scouts. When we encounter disasters such as the earthquakes that recently occurred in Haiti and Chile, we can see how important it is to be ready to give back in times of crisis. People in the developed world are in a unique situation when it comes to disasters because we have the resources to contribute in the times of greatest need. Here are some ways you can be prepared:

-Have an ‘emergency fund’ of money that you can donate immediately whenever there’s an urgent situation

-Keep canned goods and nonperishable foods in your pantry throughout the year so that you can give to food banks whenever there is a food shortage

-Don’t overspend on your credit cards so that you have a ‘cushion’ of cash that will enable you to give

-Leave some space in your schedule so that you can help someone in need when they have a problem

These are easy ways that you can be on guard and ready to help whenever a disaster strikes. Being able to help when you’re really needed is a blessing. And knowing that you’re ready can give you a sense of comfort and peace of mind.

Sleepless Service

Ever wake up in the night thinking about life? I certainly do. I wish I was able to instantly go back to sleep, but this usually isn’t the case. I think about what I want to do with my life and if I’m living the right way. I wonder what I’ll be doing a year from now, five years from now, twenty years from now… I worry about things that are not going right and try to think of solutions, but this usually isn’t effective.

Lately, instead of lying in bed pondering the unknown and trying to go back to sleep, I’ve found that it helps for me to get up and actually doing something. I’ll work on a volunteer project for Students Serve or write down ideas for new types of service. I map out what I want to do for the next couple of weeks and this gives me a better sense of direction and peace. It enables me to visually see how I am going to live out my life purpose each day. It doesn’t have to be ten years from now. It can be every day… or night!

Donation Haven

Having trouble forcing yourself to tithe or give a portion of your income away to charitable organizations and those in need? You’re not alone. There are many of us who struggle with this. For me, the solution has been to set up an extra bank account. Every time I get paid, I transfer 10% of my paycheck to my “donation haven” bank account that it set aside for giving to others. Once I transfer the donation to this account, I don’t touch it. I can still see all of the money that I’ve got to live on in my other bank accounts. Plus, seeing the donations add up each month is really satisfying. By the end of the year, I give all of the money away. That’s the easy way to give!

The Limits of Luck

In the spirit of St. Patrick’s Day yesterday, it’s worthwhile to think about luck and the role that it plays in our lives. Although some things certainly happen by chance, we can always control our response and what we do about the situations life throws at us.

Hard work and sweat equity are important ingredients in accomplishing any goal. It’s not just about luck. If you look at any of the people we deem to be successful they have all had ‘lucky breaks’ along the way. However, the common factor of their success stories is that they were never deterred despite all the bad things that happen. So, the moral of the story is to never use ‘bad luck’ as an excuse to not keep trying. We can accomplish great things, despite the ‘luck’ in our lives.

Spring Cleaning Opportunity

I’ve seen more snow this winter than I care to see for the rest of my life. D.C. has gotten record snowfalls this year, and I couldn’t be more ready for Spring. Seeing the sun and the fact that the calendar says ‘March’ makes me warm inside. And whenever the winter begins to brighten into spring, that can only mean one thing besides the fact that it’s time to start thinking about vacation. Annual spring cleaning is about to begin. The yearly purging of your closets, pantry, and shelves is also a great time to help others in need.

Nonprofit organizations that operate secondhand stores are always looking for items that they can sell. The money that they make from their stores goes directly to helping people in need. Plus, these stores can provide quality (albeit used) items to lower income individuals who cannot afford to pay the premium prices at department stores.

-If you haven’t worn an item in your closet over the past year, chances are you’ll never wear it again in your life. Go ahead and get rid of that extra baggage. Free yourself from clothes that don’t fit and don’t flatter your body!
-Have any old cooking appliances that still work perfectly well but that haven’t seen the light of day in your kitchen recently? Give them away. Your kitchen cabinets will thank you.
-If you have a storage unit, think about what you’re hanging onto that can be donated to others. Downsizing can save you money as well.
-Many of our pantries are filled with unopened cans that we’re unlikely to use. The food is still good and is nonperishable, and it can provide nourishment to someone else. Box up these items and give them to a local food bank.

Spring cleaning can give you a liberating feeling. Freedom from too much stuff can be uplifting! It can also make a difference in the life of someone in need.
 

What did Mother Theresa Do?

So, What did Mother Theresa Do?

She’s someone that is looked up to by many people across the world, but few people know exactly why she is so well-respected. Mother Theresa was a Catholic nun from Albania who is known for her extensive ministries to the orphaned children, poor, and sick in India. She started a nonprofit charity called Missionaries of Charity in Calcutta, India in 1950. She dedicated her life to this cause and later expanded the organization to countries beyond India. She passed away at age 87 in 1997, but her legacy is ongoing through Missionaries of Charity. The organization has served people in 123 countries, meeting needs through food kitchens, counseling programs for children and their families, schools, orphanages, and hospice centers for people with terminal illnesses.

“ You and I, we are the Church, no? We have to share with our people. Suffering today is because people are hoarding, not giving, not sharing.
Jesus made it very clear. Whatever you do to the least of my brethren, you do it to me.
Give a glass of water, you give it to me. Receive a little
child, you receive me...”

“Love cannot remain by itself—it has no meaning. Love has to be put into action, and that action is service.”

-Mother Theresa

Volunteering with Animals

I wish I had a pet. My beloved cat Ali, who is solid white and full of spunk, is with my parents in Nashville. I’m renting a townhouse in DC, and unfortunately I have to remain ‘pet-less’ due to my lease.

In the meantime, if you’re like me and miss having a pet of your own, there are other ways you can interact with animals. An added bonus is that you can give back to others while gaining the benefits of having a pet.

• Volunteer at an animal shelter for abused and abandoned pets
• Offer to pet sit for a friend or neighbor who’s going on vacation
• Help an organization that brings animals to nursing home residents. This is an innovative type of therapy that helps elderly people feel loved

These options can fill in the gap until you’re able to get a pet of your own. Someday…

Giving Your Trash

What could be an easier way to make a difference than giving away your trash? It’s free, doesn’t take much time, and can make a huge impact across a year or more. Recycling is something anyone can do to help take care of the Earth.

If you’re not already recycling, here’s the simple way to get started:

1. Get a paper grocery bag and fill it with old newspapers, cereal boxes, and any other items that can be recycled. (Don’t know what you can recycle? Click here and print out this guide as a reminder.)
2. Each week, place the bag outside your curb on recycling day. If you don’t have curbside recycling, find the nearest recycling location in your neighborhood.

That’s it. That’s all there is to making the world a cleaner, more sustainable place to live.
 

Giving at the Grocery Store

I love going to the grocery store. To me, there’s just something fun about getting a big cart and strolling down the aisles looking at what’s on sale and the new products that have been developed. Plus, I’m a couponer. I clip and file all of those coupons that come in the Sunday paper and then strategize how to get the biggest bargains possible. Getting things for free can be a great cheap thrill.

Not everyone can afford to buy the food that they need for their families, and there are ways you can help—even while waltzing down the supermarket aisles. If you’re like me and cut out coupons, be sure to clip the offers that you have no plan to use. For example, I have no need to buy baby formula or diapers, but I usually cut out those coupons anyway. Then, when I’m in the grocery store and passing through the baby aisle, I place the coupons that I don’t need on the shelves. You never know who will be coming along behind you. You might help a mother on WIC or food stamps save several dollars, which she can use to buy some fresh fruits and vegetables for her family. Or, even if the person who comes along behind you isn’t in financial need, you might just brighten a guy’s day when he finds that someone was thoughtful and left a coupon that allows him to get an extra bag of his favorite candy for free.

Ah, the grocery store…it’s the little things

Let's Move

Michelle Obama, our First Lady, has recently launched a new initiative to help kids get off the couch and get active. This is fantastic. It’s something that all of us need to do, whether we’re 5, 25, or 95.

Although we don’t often think of it this way, our health is a community issue that affects people all around us. From family members to co-workers to neighbors and even people we don’t know, we have a responsibility to take care of ourselves as best we can. Think about it this way.

-When you’re sick but go to work anyway, you can spread that on to others

-Illnesses are caused by bad choices that we make, such as smoking, tanning, not exercising, excessive drinking, and eating too much/too little

-A major part of our excessive healthcare costs come from illnesses that are due to these bad choices

-Because of the way our healthcare system is structured, healthy people often have to help pay the financial cost of providing treatment to sick people

We owe it to ourselves and our society. It’s time to follow our First Lady’s lead and get moving.

Service Shopping

New to service? Want to find a new place to volunteer? Here’s one of the best ways to identify a volunteer opportunity that’s right for you. I call it ‘service shopping’. Essentially, you’re shopping for a place where you can make a difference.

The concept is simple. Make a list of the local organizations that interest you and call or visit their websites to find out how you can get involved. Pick out 5 or so that seem interesting, and volunteer one time at each of them. You’ll get a feel for the effectiveness of their work and whether or not you can make an impact with them. Then, after you’ve ‘shopped’ around, you can choose to spend your volunteer time at 1 of the nonprofit groups. You can start building connections and maximizing your ability to make a difference.

The Power of Parents

Last weekend I was doing a rigorous spring cleaning. This wasn’t just running the vacuum and dusting the furniture. This was an intense effort of going through all my drawers, closets, and bookshelves to give away the things I don’t need and gain enough space to breathe again.

While I was knee-deep into my “weekend project” I realized that this is just like something my dad would do. When I was growing up (and still to this day) he never seemed to stop thinking of weekend projects to improve the house. This led me to reflect on the many ways that my parents have influenced me and shaped the person I have become. The impact that they have had on my life is incalculable.

Parents and relatives have some of the most important opportunities to change the world. They can shape their sons and daughters, nieces and nephews, godchildren, and friends’ children into our future world citizens. You don’t have to have kids to do this. What a wonderful opportunity this is! It’s something I’ll think about every time I interact with Rachael, my beloved niece.

Chuck, My Librarian

Sometimes you just happen to have a special connection with certain people. Chuck is one of those people for me. He’s my librarian in Nashville. There are many reasons why I love going to the library, and Chuck is one of them. I always look forward to seeing his smiling face. He knows me by name and never fails to greet me with a warm-hearted wave each time I visit the library. Chuck knows about my life and always asks about my family members. At one point we even learned that we share the same birthday, October 14th. We’re separated in age by several decades, but we have developed an interesting friendship, nonetheless.

He’s not rich or famous, and probably won’t receive any lifetime achievement awards. But Chuck has made a difference in my life. Chuck’s not just any librarian. He’s my librarian.

There’s no other way to say it—Chuck makes me feel special. I hope I can be like him.

Cost-free Ways to Help Chile

If you don’t have money to donate, here are ways you can still help people who were affected by the devastating earthquake in Chile:

-Firefighters and people with emergency medical training will be going to Chile to offer their services. If you know a firefighter or someone who plans to help, offer to take care of their children, watch over their house, or check the mail while they’re away.

-You can also volunteer at your local Salvation Army. This trusted organization is currently in Chile providing assistance. By donating your time to their volunteer programs, you will enable them to send as much aid to Chile as possible.

-If you have any home improvement goods such as furniture, home accessories, building materials, or appliances that you are not currently using, you can donate those items to Habitat ReStores, which are run by Habitat for Humanity. They have locations all across the US.

-Donate any clothing or shoes that you can no longer wear to a Salvation Army thrift store. You can also purchase items from these stores. Proceeds from sales are directed to Salvation Army programs, and will enable the organization to direct as many funds as possible to relief efforts in Chile.

-If you know of anyone with relatives in Chile, offer to bring them dinner or do anything else you can to provide some comfort and show that you care. This will help put their minds at ease despite the fears of friends and family members that might be missing.

In difficult times following natural disasters, such as the current situations in Chile and Haiti, we have the ability to show our compassion and give to those who have the most immediate needs. We are not powerless. Even though we may be separated by thousands of miles, cultural differences, and political ideals, we can help our global neighbors in these times of crisis.

Get Involved, Get Local

If you’re new to an area or have never really found a niche within your community, getting involved with local service organizations can help you find a place to fit in. You’ll quickly begin to get a sense of what the local issues and needs are. The complete perspective on what makes your city unique will give you a better appreciation for the area you live in. This is especially helpful if it’s not your hometown or you’d rather be somewhere else.

Here’s an easy site to find local volunteer opportunities: http://www.volunteermatch.org/

Olympian Inspiration

Watching the Olympics every two years is always inspiring to me. Seeing the athletes that have spent their lives in endless training sessions never fails to remind me of the value of working hard. In a world of magazines, TV shows, and blogs that only focus on the “simple”, “easy”, and “stress free” ways to get through life, it’s easy to forget that there is a lot of value in picking one goal and working towards it with all of your strength. This is something that I need to be reminded of as well from time to time.

Greatness does not happen in an instant. It is created over years, through self-discipline, courage, and faith. Giving ourselves to worthwhile goals can help us use and hone our talents so that achieve something excellent. Patience, perspiration, and practice can create powerful results.

Here’s something to reflect on:
What goals do you have that are worth working for?
 

What Really Matters

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
-Maya Angelou

Service in Small Ways

“I am only one,
But still I am one.
I cannot do everything,
But still I can do something;
And because I cannot do everything
I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.”
-Edward Everett Hale

To be honest, I have no idea who Edward Everett Hale is (or was) but I really like his short poem. I don’t know about you, but I constantly doubt myself when it seems like I’m confronted with a problem or situation that’s more than I can handle. Why me? What do I have to offer? Edward Everett Hale had the answer to these questions. We’re all someone and we can all do something. When we have a whole lot of “someones” each doing something, the combined results can be amazing.

It’s kind of like the sand on a beach. Each grain is tiny on its own, but when combined with thousands upon millions of other tiny, tiny grains of sand, they together make a beach. Yes, this may sound clichéd, but you can’t deny that it’s true.

Edward Everett Hale was certainly on to something here.